There is a softening that happens if you’ve been lucky enough to reach full adulthood with some innocence and hope intact. As you age, if your heart is still tender, you start to notice that life’s inevitable ups and downs don’t make you as mad as they used to. Perhaps you are just monumentally tired. You don’t feel like spewing hurt and anger every time you are trampled ... Read More
My Very Favorite Hurricane Harvey Heroes
If the majority of Americans are like me, then they are hungry for stories in which people display some basic decency. There must be a reason that when we see a policeman or coach dancing with kids, or a puppy cuddling with a cat or a teacher creating special handshakes with his students on the internet, we pass it around like water in the desert. "Here," we say to one ... Read More
How to Love Your Spouse When You are Disappointed
You know how when you first fall in love with your spouse, everything they do is cute? She is not a slob. She is charming and wildly creative! He is not disorganized. He is spontaneous and loves adventure! Look how she has five partially-full bottles of Diet Coke in her fridge. Hilarious! What a whimsical human being! He is not a control freak! He is ... Read More
Stop Helping: Good Parenting Can Mean Holding Back
The day you have a baby is the most exhilarating, terrifying day of your life. Look what you made! This tiny ball of wonder is all yours! But, also, eeek! This tiny ball of need is all yours! If you don't feed the baby and change it and also hug the baby and protect it, your little miracle doesn't have a chance of surviving. So you give up sleep, hot food and inner peace ... Read More
Letter to My Daughters: How to Be Assertive
Fierce Girls of Mine, Recently, I was in Costco when a man accidentally ran into me while I was standing in the frozen foods section. In fact, he hit me with such force that I fell against the freezer case. Do you know what I said to him when I finally regained my balance? I said, "I'm sorry." I'm sorry?! For what? For existing and buying frozen chicken? For standing ... Read More